Surviving External Vivas: Even Medicos Cry

Hello medicos. External vivas, or oral exams conducted by external examiners, are an important part of the practical examinations in MBBS life. For all of us (not even the topper is immune), these assessments can feel like a trial by fire, testing not only knowledge but also the ability to pretend you don’t want to cry. 

In this article I’ve talked about the intense experience of external vivas and how they can feel like the destruction of your existence as a med student.

The Build-Up of Anxiety

Sitting outside the examiner’s room. One student comes out, you ask him how it went. He simply draws his finger across his throat in a dramatic ‘you’re doomed’ gesture. There’s no need to say anything else, you know that you are going to walk out crying.

Unlike internal exams, where you are familiar with the examiners and their questioning style, external vivas involve examiners you haven’t met before. There is a lot of unpredictability, and mostly they are stricter than internals.

Externals examiners also have the power to change your entire grade. The pressure to perform well can be overwhelming.

The Waiting Game

You know that the viva’s going to go very bad already. Still, you have to wait for your chance. There are 2 other students in the line before you. The ones done with their vivas are giving you sympathetic looks.

This wait makes you so anxious. It becomes difficult to sit idle. Your leg is shaking like it has a mind of its own and you also resort to biting your nails. It is the calm before the storm.

It’s common to feel like you don’t know enough or that you don’t belong there, during such moments. We have all been there.

Your Chance

The examiner says ‘Next’ you look left and right and realize that it’s your turn. You take a deep breath, pat down your coat, fix the ‘Roll Number’ plate and walk inside.

In the examination room, you see the examiner sitting behind the table in a neat shirt and tie. Everything about him screams ‘serious’. You feel the little bit of confidence that you were holding on to also wash away.

You sit down, defeated already. Ready to say ‘Sorry’.

The Destruction of Confidence

Initially, the viva seems to go Okay, the examiner asks your hometown and makes the entire setting a little informal. He starts out with a few basic questions.

Then suddenly, he starts asking questions rapidly, covering a wide range of topics. This makes you flustered and scared, even though you know the answers. You answer late, he does not accept your answer.

You fail to answer and just respond with ‘Sorry Sir.’ You have officially given up. Your ‘sorry’ lights the fire and the war begins.

He starts with saying that you are ‘I don’t want your sorrys’ then goes on to say that ‘you are unfit for medicine’. It does not end there. It is a long session of destruction which ends with him asking if you have considered dropping out.

As sad as it is, it is the truth of medical colleges Student. A lot of us have experienced such statements. 

Emotional Fallout

You sit silently, taking in whatever he is saying. You leave when he asks you to. On the way out, you can feel yourself welling up but try to suppress it. You get back to the hostel and break down. The emotional impact of a difficult external viva can linger long after the exam is over.

You start thinking that whatever the examiner said was right, and that you are not meant to be here.

The stress of a bad viva affects your mental health, leading to increased anxiety or even depression.

Learning from the Experience

The first time, your seniors console you. They tell you that it is common for an external examiner to be extra strict and harsh. They help you regain your self esteem and correct your thoughts. 

Slowly, you start realizing that they are telling the truth. After facing more externals throughout the course, you start building some resilience. You start understanding the way to give a good viva. You start trying to guide the viva instead of being led by the examiner.

Ultimately, you either give good vivas, or become immune to what externals say.

The End

Every medico goes through this journey of acceptance. External vivas can feel like the destruction of your existence as a med student, but there is nothing you can do about it. They might play with your mental health if you let them. The key is to not let it get to the head.

Try to keep yourself calm before the viva, be confident and answer promptly. Remember, every doctor has gone through this process and come out on the other side—so can you.

Good luck dealing with this chapter of medico life!