Does being in a relationship affect your NEET preparation?

Hello future doctors. Parents aren’t allowed to read this blog, shh.

NEET aspirants are but teenagers just out of school, they find a new freedom, discover their own identity, and obviously start exploring. But, is NEET prep the right phase to explore? What if you are in a relationship already, will it affect your NEET preparation?

This blog is written in the form of questions. Questions that I want you to ask yourself so that you can decide for yourself. I cannot decide for you without knowing anything about your relationship. I can only help you decide, so here we go.

The basics

If the answer to any of the questions below is ‘No’ then you seriously need to rethink if the relationship is even worth it.

A. Do they support my NEET prep?

This is a requirement. If they are dismissive of your dreams and do not think about your NEET journey as anything serious then it is a big red flag. They should understand and support you in your dreams

B. Do they make me happy when I’m stressed?

They should be able to help you out. You want someone who can help you out in your stress instead of adding to the stress. You definitely do not want someone who complains that ‘You’re always so busy and so stressed, make time for me.’ 

These are the words of selfish people.

C. Am I able to communicate my commitments honestly?

Check how easy it is for you to cancel plans. Do they understand or do they throw a tantrum? Do they care about your dreams? Do you understand your commitment to NEET and how busy it makes you?

D. Can I focus on my studies without feeling insecure about my relationship?

You do not want to keep wondering if your partner is cheating on you while you’re busy. If they make you feel jealous and insecure and if they do things you specifically asked them to not do, then friend, your relationship is doomed.

How much Time and Energy is it taking?

If your relationship passed the first test, here’s the second one. These are problems that can be solved with thorough communication and respect. Here we go.

A. How much time and energy do I spend on them?

NEET aspirants study for 10 hours a day. With study, family and friends, there’s not much time left for a relationship. Are you able to spare time for them? If yes, how much? Is the amount of time you spend on them affecting the time you should spend on NEET prep?

Are you taking a chunk out of your sleep time? Are you indirectly affecting your NEET prep by not resting properly? If the answers are Yes, then you need to manage your time better. You need to prioritize and understand that the 2 years of NEET are mostly reserved for NEET and that you should spend it that way.

B. Do I feel tired and still feel like I have to give them time?

If your partner feels bad when you do not give them time when you are tired, then too, you need to have a good conversation. You should both evaluate your needs and commitments and see if they match.

There is nothing wrong with being needy, but this time calls for a partner who is at the same mental bandwidth as you. Someone who has commitments and goals of their own and understands that NEET is a ticking clock.

C. Can I balance my study schedule with my relationship?

Balance means good progress in both. A healthy relationship and good preparation. If your NEET prep is going well but your relationship is in a bad state then what is the point of being in a relationship at all? See if taking a break will work out better in the long term.

Future Challenges

This next set of questions focuses on the future. You must be sure about everything, you cannot afford emotional meltdowns during your NEET prep. Introspect and talk to your partner clearly before answering these questions.

A. How might misunderstandings impact my focus for NEET?

What if there is some miscommunication? What if there is a rough patch? What will your reaction be like? Will you be able to keep it aside and study? Do you prioritize your NEET prep over your relationship? If not, then what are the chances of such events happening? Do they happen often? Lastly, how much do you value this relationship and will you let it sabotage your career?

B. Am I ready to give my relationship up if it affects my NEET prep?

This is a very important question. You must know where you stand with respect to your dreams. Although it is not necessary that you will have to face this phase, what if you have to?

What do I do then?

If your answers are not in the favor of your relationship, don’t worry. I have listed some ways that you can solve them.

Communication

If there is a minor problem such as energy difference then it can be solved by communication. If you feel strongly about them, and if you feel like you don’t want to give it up, then try to solve it by communication. If they feel the same way, you will be able to solve it.

Break

You can always take a break and focus on NEET for 2-3 years. You can get back after you’re done. There are chances that your partner will understand and respect your choices. This is a way by which you do not love a good connection but do not sabotage your NEET preparation either.

Breaking if off

If neither of the above two solutions work then I would honestly suggest for you to break it off. Nobody should be put above your dreams and aspirations. Nobody is worth sacrificing yourself for.

Personal experience.

I wasn’t dating anyone during my NEET prep, but I know a few friends who were. Most of them were both NEET aspirants, so they used their relationship as a way to study better. They kept each other responsible, helped each other and cracked NEET together. They are now stronger than ever in MBBS. 

But then again, I also know of people who were smarter than me, but couldn’t crack NEET. All because of a bad relationship, people who pulled them down. People that they couldn’t leave after a certain time.

Conclusion

Decide for yourself. If you feel like your relationship has passed the test of the above questions then I’m really happy for you. But, if not, I want you to take a bold step. Because once you get too involved then no number of reality checks will help you get out of it easily. 

Honestly the world opens up to you after you have entered college, then you actually see the type of people out there. The NEET phase is already a very stressful phase. It is natural to want to have someone that could ease the stress but never let them ruin your NEET preparation.

All the best for your decision.